You keep blowing it Oliver
by lissylou78
Summary: When he keeps making poor choices...


She should have known to listen to her gut, she had an unsettling feeling in her stomach earlier that morning as she packed and got ready to check out. She gave Oliver an extra half hour to sleep in before heading down to his room to wake him up. Normal EA's would stop at maybe organizing a wake up call, or if she were completely honest most would probably just assume that their bosses were grown ass men who could wake themselves in the morning.

Felicity had always been the girl that went above and beyond in all tasks, especially for those who she cared about. From the moment they met Felicity didn't just cater for Oliver's every need, she anticipated them before even he did. She had an incredibly large capacity to love and to forgive. One that came in handy for Oliver in all the years that she had been working for him, and in all the time they have been friends. He has done more than his fair share of stupid things.

Lately, things have been different. As though they had reached what was almost an impasse. Something had changed between them. Whilst they both tried to act as though nothing had change, something definitely had. She caught him staring at her in more than one occasion. She found herself even more attentive and in tuned with him, if that were even possible. She knew in her heart, as hard as she tried not to, and denied it all these years, she was indeed in love with Oliver Queen. His behavior of late made her think, maybe just maybe he felt the same way too.

Clearly that was not the case when Oliver opened the door and guilt was written all over his face. Before she could ask what was wrong Isabel had appeared from behind him. A very under dressed Isabel who made a point of making it known what had transpired between them the night before or for all night long. Felicity felt her heart drop to the floor. Oliver saw the hurt that screamed at him from behind her eyes. He saw her take a deep breath and gather herself. He barely heard what she said before she turned and walked back down the hallway without a backward glance.

Felicity barely said a word the whole way home, she never looked at his direction once. Not even when he addressed her. He knew a silent Felicity was not a happy one. Worst yet, and silent Felicity was an angry one. Whilst he had done plenty on all their years as friends to anger her, this was different. She had never looked so angry, disappointed in him as she did at that moment.

When they got to the Foundry to drop off their equipment she made a point not to linger. She had waited until he had left the room before bidding Diggle a quick goodbye. Just as she was about to walk away John grabbed her hand, he wasn't blind. He had been in the midst of their dance from the beginning. He knew by the looks that Oliver had been throwing in her direction since they checked out of the hotel that he had screwed up big. Isabel's hands all over Oliver on the plane made for a pretty obvious conclusion.

"It is what it is." She said softly, in resolution. As though she should have known better. He was after all Oliver Queen.

"You need anything, you call me. You hear?" Felicity lifted her gaze and smiled at her friend grateful for him. A better adopted older brother she could not have asked for. She stood on the tip of her toes and kissed his cheek,

"Thank you. I'll be okay. Nothing a Mint Chip ice cream can't fix, downed by a bottle of wine." John watched her somewhat defeated figure walk out of the Foundry. When Oliver came back he immediately noticed her absence.

"She headed home." John answered his unasked question. John was about to say something else when Oliver watched him close his mouth and just shake his head. There were no words and by the look on Oliver's face, he was well aware that his night with Isabel had cost him

Oliver wanted to call Felicity that evening, drop by, send her a text, anything but he knew doing so would only be for his benefit and his peace of mind. He knew that all she wanted was to be alone to process, with a somewhat heavy heart he headed home to unpack.

The nature of their work meant that they were back in Foundry late that evening. Felicity had called him, and for a moment he thought it was because she was ready to talk but the tone of her voice when she told him that there was a robbery in progress told him that the last thing she wanted to do was talk to him. When they had returned to the Foundry to debrief he could tell that she was still struggling to address him.

"Felicity," Oliver said softly from behind her. Diggle had just left for the night, and she wasn't quite done therefore leaving them alone together. Felicity closed her eyes and stayed silent for a moment, Oliver could tell that she was trying to find the words,

"Why her?" so much emotion was laced between those two words that he was almost grateful that he couldn't see her face. He let out a deep breath before answering, Felicity turned her head just as he answered,

"With what we do, it's better if I don't get involved with someone I really care about." She closed her eyes, what did that even mean she muttered with her inside voice. She stood to her feet wordlessly as Oliver's eyes followed her to the door. Felicity turned around before walking out.

"I think you deserve better than her, that you deserve better full stop." she said softly and unapologetically in a way that only Felicity could before walking out without waiting for a response.

For the amount of grace that Felicity gave him, they were able to relatively move forward without too much effort. Diggle couldn't begin to tell him just how he lucked out with that and not to take it for granted because such grace will eventually run out.

"Hey, you are never going to lose me." Oliver promised solemnly as he insisted she tell him what was going on. She couldn't lie to him, and having him ask her, she couldn't deny him the truth. After taking a deep breath she began to tell her about his mother, and the lies that she was tangled in, and how that affected Thea, and him. Her heart broke for him as she saw the pain in his eyes even though his face stayed neutral.

"I'm sorry Oliver." She said tearfully. Oliver grabbed both her hands in his,

"Don't be. Thank you, for always telling me the truth." He said dropping his lips to her forehead before heading to the stage to give a speech for his mother.

Oliver disappeared into the crowd the moment he had stepped off the stage and Felicity had slipped out before Moira Queen had the opportunity to unleash her fury. Felicity went to the Foundry and it wasn't a surprise that he wasn't there, but it was where she wanted to check first. She went for a drive looking for him, even if she knew that it was futile. When Oliver Queen did not want to be found, no one would find him. He knew enough to take the battery out of his phone so he couldn't be tracked.

"He'll be okay Felicity," John said trying to reassure his friend knowing that she felt terrible being the one who had to tell Oliver that his mother was all kinds of evil that no one expected. He didn't envy the position she was in, but at the same time he was certain that such news could not have come from anyone else. That had it been anyone else Oliver would have questioned it, and more than likely had banished the person before him. Whilst he knew Felicity, believed in her down to his core, and knew that she was honest to a fault.

"What if he's not John? I mean, I wouldn't be. Would you be?"

"Okay, maybe okay would be over stating it. He just needs some time to process. We will be here when he's ready." Felicity nodded. They had spent most of the afternoon looking for Oliver. After grabbing some Belly Burger for dinner, they headed back to the Foundry with it hoping to find Oliver there.

"Stop poking a bear Felicity," John said amused, as they walked into the the Foundry Felicity hassling him about his love life.

"What? I just want to know that you're following through from you know, Russia." She answered knowing that they had somehow rekindled their romance,

"Drop it," John said rolling his eyes, knowing it would be futile, he would end up telling her anyway. John stopped in his tracks causing Felicity to run right into him,

"Dig," she said almost stumbling. Before he could say anything her eyes fell on the very thing that had caused his sudden stop. Oliver and Sara hastily grabbed their clothing from where they had thrown them off after hearing them coming into the Foundry.

"Ugh, don't stop on our account. We'll just go eat elsewhere." Felicity stammered,

"To be honest, I'm not hungry anymore. So we'll just go. Right Dig?" Oliver saw the blood drain from Felicity's face.

"Yeah, we'll go. Let's take the night off." He replied he said leading a somewhat shell shocked Felicity out the Foundry doors.

"Dig, I gotta go okay. I, I can't do this now. Cover for me." She said pleadingly.

"Go. Call me if you need me." Felicity nodded and threw her arms around his waist. John enveloped him in his arms trying to drown the hurt she was feeling with his embrace.

"He's a moron." He murmured into her hair. Felicity smiled,

"You won't hear my arguing. I'll call you later. I just don't want to see that 'I didn't mean to hurt you' face. I'm a little over it."

"Take all the time you need kiddo."

"Thank you." Felicity gave him one last hug before running to her car and driving out of there as fast as she could. Dig knew that to cover for Felicity meant Oliver had to buy that they were together so he followed close behind driving out with his car.

Felicity was feeling so many things she couldn't quite pin point the most dominant feeling. All she knew is that she couldn't face him or her at that point. The sad part was she genuinely liked Sara for all the insecurity she felt around her, Sara was nothing but supportive and loving towards her. She felt robbed of the friendship that they were still developing and it made her even madder. She was angry, she was sad, she was disappointed, devastated, heart broken and that was just to name a few.

The moment they had heard the banter between Dig and Felicity it was like a bucket of cold water was thrown at them. Oliver had been so upset about his mother that he had switched to the old Oliver and dealt with it the only way he knew how. It felt justified, until he saw her face. It paled in comparison to the look on her face when she had caught him with Isabel. He was all kinds of idiotic, and he knew it.

Sara felt awful knowing that Felicity loved Oliver, even if she didn't quite know it yet. But old habits die hard and she and Oliver had a history that drew them together like magnets, and the look on Felicity's face was sobering. She had never wanted to hurt anyone, especially Felicity who was so selfless and loving. Even to her. She had treated her more like a sister than Laurel had since she'd been back.

"You should go find her Ollie," she said softly placing a hand on his arm as he continued to stare at the door where he watched his best friends walk out of fifteen minutes ago. Oliver turned his head to look at her,

"I'm sorry Sara,"

"So am I Ollie. Go. I'm okay. She needs you. You need her in ways you've never needed anyone in your life. Fight for her." Oliver nodded and kissed her on the cheek before running out the door.

He put his phone back together dialing her number not at all surprised that her service advised him that the number he dialed had been switched off. He tried Dig next who let his call go to voicemail trying to buy Felicity as much time as he could. Oliver found Dig at Big Belly Burger reading a book. He slip into the John's booth wordlessly. John looked up from his book and looked down again shaking his head.

"I don't know where she is, and even if I did. I wouldn't tell you."

"Dig,"

"Oliver, you're a brother to me but it is taking all of my self control not to reach over and punch you in the face."

"I'd welcome it,"

"I know you would, but I'm not here to make you feel better."

"Dig…"

"If the words 'it didn't mean anything' are about to come out of your mouth Oliver, so help me God." John paused for a moment to gather his composure,

"You slipped out of that meeting and you left Felicity there wide open for your mother's fury without a backward glance. You decided to shut down and just forget about the very person who risked everything to tell you what you needed to know. Do you know what she did despite that? She spent the rest of the day worrying about you, looking for you leaving no stone unturned because that's just the kind of person she is. Concerned for her friend who was so lost in himself that he grabbed the warmest body nearest to him potentially hurting more than just one woman he claims to care so much about." John said evenly. Oliver covered his face with both hands,

"I know, I'm sorry."

"Man, it's not me you own an apology to. The good news is she is the kind of person that would forgive you simply because she loves you, but I am telling you right now. She will never get that image out of her head. She will never forget what you did. You broke her, and she will never be the same again. You have to live with that for the rest of your life." Oliver knew John's words to be true. He had stolen something from Felicity and it he saw it dim the light within her, and he will never forgive himself for that.


End file.
